I am sorry

Yes. Everytime I am on NG, I will update this post to include my thoughts. It may be smart, it may be mature, it will probably be the opposite, but here they are.

I plan to update this till this time next year or until I get bored.

31/12/2008
ITS NEW YEAR.............and I am doing nothing. I really must go to a news year party next year, too bad I hate drunk people.

01/01/2009
Why must Xmas and New year be so close. I love both of them but I have a big meal on each day too. Xmas should be in August or something.

02/01/2009
Bruce Campbell is awesome. No ifs or buts.

03/01/2009
You know what should be more widespread? Those forks with the one sharp side. They were cool, better then sporks. And more practical.

04/01/2009
I'm shit on Gears of War 2 online. I played one game, got my head blown off, then my connection fucked up.

07/01/2009
It's good to sleep because you are tired.

11/01/2009
MARIIAAAA!!!!!!! Gears of War 2 ridiculous fun on Horde and on Insane.

18/01/2009
This blog-a-day thing isn't going to well. Sorry NG, I'm just disinterested in you atm. I'll be back though.

25/01/2009
Lots of work to do today due to being on the 360 all yesterday, go me. I feel sorry for my PS3, it needs some games, I haven't been on it for a month because COD:WaW is boring as fuck now. Roll on Killzone 2.

26/01/2009
A friend put something forward to me today, an all-nighter on the Xbox360 from 12pm Saturday night till 12pm Sunday night. No one is allowed to fall asleep. Can I do it? Lets wait till next week.
Game On.

27/01/2009
Oh dear god Microsoft!! Jesus Christ.
http://www.asylum.co.uk/2009/01/26/mic rosoft-ruins-every-good-song-in-the-wo rld/
.
Also I seem to be keeping this constant atm. Go team Dave.

28/01/2009
I was nearly in a fight today. I just hit him in the face and then a friend told him to back off. Waste of time really.

01/02/2009
Worms is awesome. 'Nuff said. Okay, I'll say more. Downloaded it from Xbox Live Arcade, played it with a mate, great fun. I missed it.

02/02/2009
A written experience of the RE5 demo with me and the AI partner:
shes all, "zombies SHIT" and I'm all "run away then bitch" and she is all "NNNAAAAAAAA" and Im all "FFFFFFFUUUUUU, wtf bitch" and shes all "im sure these zombies won't come after me" and then im all "ok whatever" and she is all "OH SHIT HELP" and im all "no bitch"
so yeah, i don't like her.

03/02/2009
New level, wowza!! I won't know what to do with myself!

10/02/2009
Oh hi thar. I'm back, AGAIN. Anywho, im gonna be back on Stickam. So I may see you there.

11/02/2009
DOUBLE NEWS, kinda.
. First:
I'm gonna buy Gmod, see if it is any good, so this laptop better run the fucker.
. Second
DIET.
My daily requirements are:
.only eat at the proper times e.g breakfast, dinner, tea
.only two soft drinks (coke, sprite etc) a day, rest of the time is water or fruit juice.
.MORE VEGETABLES, even though I do already eat a lot of vegetables, which is probably part of the problem
. one piece of chocolate or sweets (candy) a day.
Anyway, it would help if I also did some exercise to compliment that but I'm too busy, so this eat less crap, drink less crap diet will at least contribute.

13/02/2009
Ok, i won't be going back on Stickam, it is truly shit now. oh well.
also snow, lots of it today. yay.

14/02/2009
Ohh Valentines Day. Here I am, sitting at home, watching All Dogs Go To Heaven 2. At least I have the wonderful knowledge that only two of my friends have got something better to do today. I should make a list of things I wish to do this year. Tom Fulp said it was a good idea to make lists in one of his newsposts so I might make one. Whether I use it or not is a different matter though.
Anywho, <3 you all, especially you <insert name here>, you are the best.

16/02/2009
I need to stop playing Left4Dead versus till 3am in the morning. Good fun though, especially as a Boomer.
WAARGHBLBLWARABLLBLBLBLLLL!!! (that is what a boomer sounds like when it vomits, kinda)

21/02/2009
Haven't had much to say recently 'cos I haven't been up to much.
Anyway I really should stop playing the 360 till 3/4 am. It's getting ridiculous.
Also, a good book is The Ice Man. It is about a Mafia hitman who committed hundreds of murders. Good biography.

01/03/2009
March yay.
Also Muse - Take a Bow (symphonic)

04/03/2009
I wish I only had one medal now and I would want it to be the Rambo one. Him just staring. Stallone is awesome.

11/03/2009
I am updating this. Honest. Anywho, atm I'm just messing with photoshop creating a comic front page in for Media. I love this lesson.

15/03/2009
It seems a lot of new users just seem to quote someone and say "agreed" or "lol" or make ridiculously stupid posts. General now seems more retarded then usual. How nice.

21/03/2009
I never thought I would feel guilty over a game but blowing up Megaton makes me sad. Maybe it is just because I forgot the bobble head in there but I feel a sense of loss. Definitely the bobble head.
--- Birthday on 16th April. I hope someone on here remembers.

01/04/2009
Man, I actually like this new China look. Takes a bit of getting used to but red is good.

4/04/2009
I wrote this particular post on my early birthday present. An Ipod Touch. It's harder then it looks.

7/04/2009
OUTRAGEOUS

12/04/2009
GHWT in 4 days!! GHWT in 4 days!! omg omg omg I'm such a child!!!

15/04/2009
I got WT early :3 I sing and play bass. Can't play drums at all. Not even on easy

16/04/2009
It's my birthday today. May make some birthday resolutions. Post more maybe, update this more often. Work harder. IDK. Anyway, cake and drink today. Its all good.

18/04/2009
Motherfucking Tool. Goddamn them and their ridiculously long songs. Goddamn them to hell.

21/04/2009
OH GOOD LORD SCIENCE. You never cease to amaze me...ever....ever..
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DpiUZI_
3o8s&feature=related

25/04/2009
Work, work, work, work...more work :(

01/05/2009
MAY.
Also a Transformers trailer is out. Michael Bay is slightly mental.

03/05/2009
Is it wrong to be attracted to women with white hair. And I don't mean really blond or grey, I mean pure white.
Goddamn Monsters vs Aliens. At least it was a good film.

04/05/2009
BANK HOLIDAY!
What a boring day. Oh well, Guitar Hero all day.

Well I guess this is it. Xmas 2009 and then the new year. This year seems to have gone fast, but it has been good. I've only been here just over a year too. How time flies.

Anyway, Merry Xmas and all that jazz

Source: Cracked

'Twas the night before xmas
when all through the house
not a creature was stirring
(not even a mouse)

The stockings where hung by the chimney with care
In hopes that Saint Nicholas soon would be there
Both mother in 'kerchief and father in cap
Had just settled down for a long winters nap
Visions of sugar plums danced in their heads
While one special girl lay awake in her bed

Alone in her room was little Maureen
Too excited to sleep, to excited to dream
The Christmas spirit made her feel so inspired
and, though she'd been working, she still wasn't tired
She worked 9 to 5, at American Eagle
and just turned 18, which was good (meaning legal)

From inside the closet, I saw through a crack
Her rosy red cheeks and her super sweet rack
She smiled as Santa Clause danced in her head
I smiled as well, (though Santa is dead)
She sat up in bed and looked to the sky
Listening close to the reindeer in high

In the glow of the moon, Maureen looked so pretty
From the top of her head, to the base of them titties
"Oh Santa" she asked, "will you come tonight?"
"Don't know about Santa but I came alright!"

She turned to the closet, where I had hidden all day
And asked "who was that? what did you say?"
"Uhh," I mumbled, zipping up quick.
"Can't you tell? It's me: Ole' Saint Nick."
"Oh Santa," she said, smiling ear to ear
"I should have known it was you, hiding in here."
She fell for it - PHEW - the lie didn't fail
At least for today, I won't end up in jail

"Yes Maureen, It was I in your closet."
Then I winked my right eye, "or should I say Clause-it."
"Oh my gosh Santa, you know my name!
But your joke doesn't work, (both words sound the same)
I'm sorry to say, your joke has a glitch"
"Well hohoho," I said. Man, what a bitch.

"Oh Santa, are you here with presents for me?
Some in the stocking, some in the tree?
Did I get what I wished for? Please tell me Saint Nick!"
"You bet!" Here's hoping she wished for some dick.
"I'll give you your presents, but first, one condition:
What I say is important so please, Maureen, listen-
I'm tired, after all the toys I've dropped off,
To lift Santa's spirits, please take your top off."

She paused just briefly, scratching her head.
As I slowly, but surely, inched my way to her bed.
"That doesn't sound right, are you lying by chance?"
"Girl, don't be ridiculous, take off your pants."
She didn't say yes, (though she didn't say no)
But clearly suspicion was starting to grow.

"In all the Xmas storied I've read,"
"People keep there clothes on," she finally said.
I knew I was caught, and I shouldn't have risked it,
but I charmingly said, "All your stories are bullshit!"
She still didn't know I was an imposter,
But she was catching on...Lobster

"Santa," she asked, rubbing her chin,
"I don't have a chimney, so how'd you get in?
And where is your beard, your belt and your boots?
Where's your red hat, and your big santa suit?
Why aren't you giving out presents, it's Xmas!"
"Frankly, Maureen, that's none of your business."
Back to the window, Maureen looked outside
Searching most likely, for Santa's sleigh ride.
"Where is your sleigh? I just see a van."
"Don't worry about that, and please call me Dan."

She faced me again, this time with alarm
She squinted her eyes, and crossed her arms.
"I know you aren't Santa, now, you better not lie:
Who are you, how'd you get in here and why?"

I took a deep sigh. "Alright, I'll come clean:
I won't lie this time, I'm sorry Maureen
I'm a regular guy, who's just down on his luck-
Our country's a mess, the job markets fucked
With all this misfortune, I just saw no reason
To smile or laugh, this holiday season

I saw you this morning, at the bus stop near Sears,
And I just couldn't help but well up with tears
Your smile so wide, your eyes, so bright;
For the first time in years, I thought, I'll be allright

So I followed you home, slowly, discreetly
And hid in your closet, and masturbated sweetly."
"How does one masturbate sweetly?" she asked
"That seems, to me, an impossible task."
"I suppose I could show you, the process I go through
But," I said with a grin "why don't I show you?"

Lets hope so. Been snowing like crazy recently and it is snowing so bad at the moment that some buses are being cancelled. Had to wait an hour for one. Bastards. Anyway, I'm hoping the snow storms keep up 'cos I want a proper Christmas, none of that bright sunny Christmases, proper grey, white and miserable weather.

I might put up a picture later when (if) the snow stops. Gonna measure it. I would estimate at least 2 inches so far.

and there was a box with with the NG sticker on it and the my name. I opened it and to my sheer joy, found STUFF. But not any old STUFF, no, FANCY, FREE STUFF.

Awesome Sauce

This is not 'Nam. This is bowling. There are rules.

You are entering a world of pain...

Luis made the photoshop thread of Tom and April into a contest. I wasn't feeling too original so didn't submit till nearly the last minute. Anyway, turns out they liked it and I win anything from the store and a pink castle crasher. I decided to get the Tankmen figurine since I have enough shirts.

I seriously feel awesome and way too lucky. Oh well, I get free stuff!!

*I'll put up pictures when the stuff arrives"

Oh yeah, BOOYAH

I use gold bricks to polish my Porsche, doesn't work very well but fuck it, I have 12.

njbjhdbhbew fher fbhre fn r hvbrhef bnhaerbghejlabjrhgbeajrbafghbregvgagkn rbeaglbare

TRUMPETS.

edit: I haven't even been here a year and I have over 4,000 posts. I don't think that is good.